Do You Kiss Your Mother With That #$%@* Mouth?!

CW: strong language, obviously

I remember sitting through a sermon about…I don’t know, helping the needy or something. I should remember exactly what it was, because it was one of those important messages, like the stuff Jesus really cared about. The reason this sermon sticks out in my memory was the illustration the pastor used, though. The thing that made it powerful. A little four-letter word that made the entire auditorium freeze. And the kicker:

“You all probably cared more about the fact that your pastor just cursed than the fact that there are people out there suffering.”

That moment stuck with me. We make an idol out of not saying certain words because hey, that’s not what “good Christians” do. But is there any truth to the old “no cussin’” rule that’s been shoved down our throats since childhood? Do we all need to rinse our mouths out with soap?

Let me preface by saying this: Christian or not, there are certain situations where we should use nothing but clean language. If you’re around children, absolutely do not drop an f-bomb! Same with formal meetings — can you imagine asking for a mother-effin’ raise? You’d be fired on the spot, or at least laughed out of the workplace.

But Christians should never, ever, EVER say bad words! Right, Jess? RIGHT?!

In Philippians 3:8, Paul describes the things of this world as garbage compared to the worth of knowing Christ. Except, that’s not what he said. The word he used for “garbage” was “skubalon,” an old, crude Greek word for dung. In other words, shit. He called it all shit. And is he wrong to compare all worldly things to shit, especially when compared to the greatness that is Jesus? That’s a strong, but not necessarily unfounded, comparison.

Ephesians 4:29 says “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Like I said before, there’s a time and a place for strong language. After all, words have power. We need to think about the context in which these words are being used. Obviously, things like racial slurs are never acceptable, but the traditional “four-letter words” are a little more ambiguous. Spongebob eloquently described them as “sentence enhancers,” and there’s some truth to that. Because of the power of these words, they draw attention. Sometimes they draw attention to things that need attention, like the example at the start of this post. Sometimes, they’re used to cause harm. But like most words, they’re just…neutral.

You don’t need to be Mister Rogers in your speech around absolutely everyone all the time. When the Bible says to build people up “according to their needs,” maybe they need to hear that they’re “fucking awesome,” or that they’re “a badass.” If you’re not comfortable with such language, no one’s saying you HAVE TO talk that way, but as Christians, I feel we need to loosen the “no cussing ever” rule to account for situations where strong language is used positively. No matter what we say or how we say it, it should not be words intended to break someone down. Telling someone to “fuck off” or calling them a “piece of shit” is absolutely unacceptable and has no place in a Christian’s vocabulary. Even phrases that don’t contain profanity can be hurtful. If someone said “I hope your mom dies,” I’d be way more offended than if someone called me a “bitch.” Again, it’s all about context and intent.

Whatever you say, and whoever you say it to, do it with love. That’s one thing I think we can all heckin’ agree on.